Thursday, June 23, 2011

Thoughts are creating our Future - Louise L. Hay



It's been raining here for days, well 2 days, but it feels like days upon days especially since I am wanting to get things done, and the rain and dark gloom that comes with it makes me kind of sleepy and it's hard for me to go outside and play. There's a window close to my bed that streams light as the sun rises and it helps to get me moving, but on dark days it's absence sets me back a bit. And I start to get grumpy. I start to wish for sunshine and I start this inner monologue that sounds something like, "Shit it's raining again, now I won't get to accomplish all those things I wanted to do outside. I won't be able to take my walk. I won't be able to work in the yard, I won't, I won't, I won't, blah, blah, blah!" Then I am immediately irritable and feel like I am living inside some part of the movie, "Seven". Then inevitably more darkness prevails and I don't want to do a f-ing thing! But imagine the cumulative effect this thinking can have on my life when I react this way every single time it rains. It's been raining quite a bit here and I clearly don't want those thoughts shooting out into a universe that hears everything I say and then creates it for me!

And there's another part that is hidden deeper inside, it says all of this universal creation stuff is just crap and you are looking for some way to avoid the reality, searching, clinging, reaching for an answer to why things are the way they are so you will look for it somewhere on Youtube in a lame attempt to make yourself feel better and stay in denial of the circumstances that surround you. I know it's a run on sentence, but that's how it plays, lack of punctuation and all. And, but the thing is, does it matter if it's all crap or untrue or made up fantasy? I am allowed to believe what I want. I am allowed to choose how I will see the world and the way I want to see it is in better company with my own thoughts about everything. I think my willingness to see a brighter, prettier side of life is what has kept me going through ordeals that would put most people in a mental ward. And if I want to stand before a mirror on a daily basis and tell myself I love me I will do it! Because the opposite of that is sitting around feeling sorry for myself and having done quite a lot of that over the years I can see where that has gotten me to.

Why not choose the brighter side of life? Why not do something that enhances the way you see yourself instead of the other? Can it hurt? I doubt it! Can it make you feel silly sometimes? Probably! But silly is better than sad and scowling and angry. Plus it feels happier and funny! Being too serious about life is the best way to ruin it! All we ever have is this moment so why not have fun?

2 comments:

  1. Yes Maria, have fun. What harm can it do? None whatsoever and you will feel better and therefore those around you will feel better. The little ripples will spread - just you wait and see.

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  2. I am grateful I recognize my need to be grateful. I'm grateful I see in my victimy daughter who I could be since I have the "what have you done for me lately, God" angry little girl in me and she feels like sh*t. I am grateful that I know that and I'm willing to feel grateful. Just like you.

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